Sometimes you just have to force yourself to leave the house. Sometimes forcing yourself to do things you would really rather not be doing is the one thing that can make you feel better. Even if ‘feeling better’ only really means that you’re ignoring the problem; as long as it puts a smile on your face, I think it’s acceptable.
I have found myself in an interesting situation and I don’t know what to do. I was in hibernation over the holidays, mostly because of all this and partially because I felt the need to disconnect. Of course I didn’t disconnect completely; I still visited sites and answered tweets or messages that I got (for the most part) but I didn’t post anything. I barely even read what others had to say.
I had so much going on in my head ((I still do)) that I just couldn’t take anymore information. But once I woke up on Monday, it was like a huge cloud had been lifted and I began to see things with some clarity. Though it has gotten easier to deal with things, I still feel empty in the mornings. I’m sure it’ll get easier to deal with too, but I’m not sure I want to. Sometimes, I’m not sure it’s worth it.
This weekend, even though I was really not in the mood, I decided to make plans with people. Including going over to my parents’ place on Friday night. What a fun night that turned out to be. We had just finished dinner and I had the urge to play board games but they only had Bingo… so we played. Such fun! I even won $3!
When that was done, I noticed we were all still lingering around the dinner table so I suggested we play rockband in my brother’s room in the basement. They were apprehensive at first, and when we started to play my Dad was having trouble with the drums but he persevered ((making me love him even more)) and came out doing quite well! We played until 1am!
I got home and didn’t feel empty when I looked at my bed for once, and that can only be a good thing. Even if I was only temporarily distracted from my feelings.
How do you deal with negative feelings? Do you face them head on or ignore them?
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So you want to know more about me? Aside from "fragileheart", I'm also known as Reg, or Reggy. I'm Canadian by passport, and Filipino-Chinese by blood but I've always felt a person of the world. With 28 years of 'life' under my belt, I know better than to think that I know everything there is to know in the world - but I still have my opinions.
I wanted to sit and sulk at home but dragged myself and my sister out to the movies instead. Made a difference. I’m realizing that healthy distractions are needed to pull me out of a funk, even if temporarily. Helps to remind me of the times where things weren’t so blah. So with that up feeling, I got a surprise on Sunday that I wouldn’t have been able to receive/accept/compute had I not been out of my funk.
Don’t know if that’s facing my feelings or ignoring them, but it’s something.